Now Hyung-sik finally understood the Pastor's meaning. His heart jolted. The Pastor asked, "What do you think?"
Hyung-sik didn't know what to think. He sat still.
"Mr. Lee has been teaching Seon-hyeong English, hasn't he?"
"Yes, since a few days ago."
"Do you know what that means?"
"What do you mean?"
"Haha, I mean the meaning behind the request to teach English."
"..."
"Nowadays it's different from before—marriage isn't simply decided by parents. They want to let you two get to know each other for a while. So, what do you say?"
"I'm not worthy of such a thing. I can barely take care of myself, how could I possibly marry?"
"That's not the issue."
"It's the biggest issue. How can I marry without any financial foundation? That's the real problem."
"It is a big problem, but first, you'll study in America for three or four years, and after that... what's there to worry about? And Seon-hyeong—a girl like her isn't easy to find. Mr. Lee is truly blessed... Well, give me your answer."
Still Hyung-sik sat with his head bowed. The Pastor laughed and fanned himself. The old woman grew anxious, wondering why Hyung-sik wouldn't say yes. Useon, recalling his conversation with Hyung-sik back in Andong, smiled to himself. Everyone was delighted, but Hyung-sik alone suffered in silence.
The Pastor said, "Come, there's nothing to think over. Give me your answer now."
"I'll tell you later. I don't know how to express my gratitude for thinking so highly of someone like me."
"Why wait for later? And this afternoon, you'll come with me to Andong Kim Jang-ro's house. They said they'd treat us to dinner."
Hyung-sik didn't know what to do. He needed to go to Pyongyang, but attending Andong Kim Jang-ro's dinner seemed more important. Yet, abandoning his resolve to find Yeongchae's body and immediately turning to Seon-hyeong with a yes—that shamed him. The very words "Seon-hyeong and I are engaged" made him happy just hearing them. He even thought, it's fortunate that Yeongchae died. And on top of that, "Study in America!" How could his heart not be drawn? A beloved beauty and a lifelong dream of studying in the West! If either one alone could sway Hyung-sik's heart, then both together—how could he resist? A voice inside him couldn't help but say, "Great fortune has come to me." If you looked closely at Hyung-sik's face, bowed as if in pain, you would surely see an irrepressible joy. When he first faced the Pastor, his expression was indeed pained. But with each word from the Pastor, that pain vanished, replaced by a glow of happiness—like snow melting under the warm spring sun, mountains and fields suddenly bursting into spring colors. That's why he couldn't lift his head. He was ashamed to show his joy. He tried hard to force a pained expression, even deliberately trying to feel troubled.
In moments like this, Hyung-sik's mind grew confused. He could impulsively decide things without looking back, but other times he hesitated endlessly—should I or shouldn't I? Even while walking, he might stop dozens of times, unable to decide. That was the mark of a weak-willed person. His quick decisions came from weakness, and his inability to decide also came from weakness. Now Hyung-sik didn't know what to answer. He wished someone beside him could answer for him. He lifted his head and looked across the room toward Useon. He knew Useon could make decisive choices in such situations. Useon smiled and looked back at him.
🙝 🙟
Useon winked at Hyung-sik. Hyung-sik pretended not to notice. Useon winked again. Hyung-sik saw it all despite pretending otherwise. Then he lowered his head again, feeling more embarrassed and more confused. He tried to interpret the meaning of Useon's wink—was it "agree quickly" or "why are you sitting here instead of going to Pyongyang?" He couldn't tell.
The old woman, as if unable to bear it any longer, nudged Useon and said, "Why won't Mr. Lee agree? Doesn't he like that girl?"
"Hmph, that girl is famous in Seoul as a beauty."
"And rich?"
"Rich enough that they're sending their son-in-law to America."
The old woman didn't understand the connection between sending someone to America and being rich, but she clicked her tongue and loaded her pipe. "Then why is he sitting there like that?" The Pastor urged again, "Go ahead, say yes."
Finally Hyung-sik managed, "Then I'll go! But about the engagement, let's discuss it later..." The Pastor laughed and said, "I'll stop by on my way back from church," then left. Hyung-sik saw him out to the gate and returned. His face looked like someone waking from a dream. Useon ran over, grabbed his hand, and shook it. "You've hit the jackpot! A beauty and study in America!" Hyung-sik turned away to avoid Useon's eyes, but there was laughter in his own. Useon added, "Huh, you've got some skill. In just two or three days, you've easily won Seon-hyeong!"
The old woman also laughed. "I knew it. That's why you didn't stop her when Yeongchae came... Poor Yeongchae... Mr. Lee already had his eye on someone else, and she..." Before she finished, Useon turned to her and winked, "Shh!" Hyung-sik pretended not to hear and said to Useon, "I resigned from Gyeongseong School."
"When did you resign? You should wait until you're engaged. Hahaha."
"No, it's not that. I'm quitting teaching."
"Of course. You'll come back from studying in America and become a university professor."
Hyung-sik spun around angrily. "You're just mocking me. I'm troubled here..."
"Uh-huh, I sympathize. You must be very troubled." The old woman came closer and said, "I don't know how happy I am. Mr. Lee is getting married, so my son..." She stopped, feeling sad and also presumptuous comparing Hyung-sik to her own son. "When you go this evening, make sure you agree. Why were you sitting there like a statue earlier? Hehe, I suppose you're shy because you're still a young master."
Hyung-sik didn't know what to do. He kept raising and lowering his head, clenching his left fist and releasing it, cracking his knuckles. Then he said, "Listen, I'm leaving for Pyongyang now. No matter what..."
Useon glared at him as if threatening. "Tsk, you fool. Even if a daughter rots, they'd give her to someone like you?"
At that, Hyung-sik laughed. He really had said something foolish. Useon said, "From now on, be a man. What's this? You're not a girl... Forget the nonsense. Go to Andong Kim Jang-ro's house tonight. There'll be talk of marriage, so don't act like a fool like before—agree. And then go to America. I heard about Gyeongseong School. Even if you don't resign, you'll probably get expelled."
"Expelled? Why?"
"Because you followed a gisaeng to Pyongyang. Payback for Cheongnyangni. So, get engaged and go to America."
"Then what about Yeongchae?"
"What can you do about a dead Yeongchae? Are you going to follow her in death? Become a chaste man instead of a chaste woman? Stop being foolish and do exactly as I say."
Hearing Useon's words, Hyung-sik felt somewhat reassured. He'd had similar thoughts, but his own thinking didn't bring peace. Only after hearing Useon's lively words did he finally feel at ease. Hyung-sik decided to follow Useon's advice. Following Useon's instructions felt more satisfying than following his own thoughts. He smiled faintly and said, "Well, alright." The old woman beamed too.
"Shall I prepare lunch? Secretary Shin, you can have some too."
"Are you making jjigae again?" Useon pulled a cigarette from Hyung-sik's vest pocket as if it were his own and tapped it against his palm.
"Forget it. What jjigae?"
"Go and order some naengmyeon," Hyung-sik said, standing up.
"Oh, you're treating us? If you're treating, buy some beer."
"Do I have money?"
"What's the worry for a rich man's son-in-law?"
"I'll deal with that when the time comes."
"Don't you have that five won?"
"I have to go to Pyongyang."
"Pyongyang again?"
"Yes, to look for the body."
"It's already floated out to the Yellow Sea! Do you think it's still under Cheongnyu Cliff waiting for a heartless guy like you? Come on, let's go to a Chinese restaurant."
"Already in the Yellow Sea?" Hyung-sik looked up at the sky. The midday sun hung right over the center of Seoul, pouring down its fire as if to scorch everything. Hyung-sik suddenly felt the heat anew.
🙝 🙟
The sun hung on the ridge of Inwangsan. The shadow of Jongno's power line lay long across the ground. The glass of Jonghyeon Catholic Church's spire reflected the setting sun, flashing like fire. The tofu seller's cry of "Tofu or bean curd!" was no longer heard. Families left their front and back doors wide open, wiping sweat with one hand while eating dinner. Bukak's yellow soil glowed red in the slanting sunlight, and from the grove of old trees in Gyeongbokgung's rear garden came the noisy chatter of evening magpies.
The roof tiles that had baked red all day breathed hot gusts as the soft wind from the Han River blew in. The faces of passersby were flushed. Shopkeepers who had been sitting inside now stepped out onto the street, wiping sweat from their tired faces as if to say, "The cool night is coming."
The sunset that had lightly draped over the pine grove on Namsan gradually faded as if erased, and from within the lush branches and leaves, a purple twilight crept out like spiderwebs. The sun's disk dropped off Inwangsan's head. A cone-shaped remnant of sunset still lingered on Bukaksan. A bluish curtain spread over the myriad households of Jangan. One end of it stretched out and covered Bukaksan. Finally, even that cone was dyed blue.
From Gangwon-do, the Gureumsan mountain rose. At first it looked like flames, then gradually cooled and darkened. As it darkened, the curtain over Jangan deepened, turned purple, and finally became gray. Then small electric lights blinked open like fireflies. The noisy music from theaters and movie houses began.
At Jongno and along the stream, strollers with cigarettes in their mouths and fans in hand grew more numerous. Small carts were brought out to set up night markets, stakes were driven, and screens erected. People, with full bellies and cool bodies, felt refreshed. Even those who had slept through the day gradually stirred, talking and laughing.
At Andong Kim Jang-ro's house, every room was lit. Water had been sprinkled in the yard, and the scent of earth mixed with flowers from the garden, exciting the nerves of the merry diners. Elder Kim wiped his eight-character mustache with a handkerchief. Pastor Han leaned back, supporting himself on his arms. Hyung-sik took a sip of sungnyung and rinsed his mouth silently. The three had enjoyed a delicious and pleasant dinner.
In another room, the wife, Seon-hyeong, Sunae, and a maidservant also had a delicious and pleasant dinner, smiling at each other without a word. A rosy glow seemed to spread across Seon-hyeong's cheeks—whether it was a trick of the beholder's eyes, who could say. The wife gazed at her beautiful daughter as if entranced. Seon-hyeong glanced at her mother, then turned to Sunae. "Sunae, go play the harmonium. Let's see if you've forgotten what you learned."
"Yes, go play the harmonium," the wife said, standing up first. Seon-hyeong and Sunae went to the room with the harmonium.
Seon-hyeong sat on the stool, gathered her skirt, opened the harmonium lid, and ran her fingers down the keyboard. Clear notes, from high to low and back, lightly trembled in the twilight air. Sunae stood with one arm on the harmonium, watching Seon-hyeong's white hands move up and down. Seon-hyeong spread out the large sheet music, tilted her head, hummed "la-la-la-la" once, then found the first key and began to play. Her eyes followed the notes on the page, her hands followed the white keys. As the tempo varied, Seon-hyeong's body moved fast or slow. Beautiful sound filled the room, overflowed, drifted on the twilight breeze, crossed the yard, over the wall, spreading in all directions like waves. How many people quietly listened? How many stopped walking on the street?
Seon-hyeong's hands rose and fell with the melody, her body moving with them. Finally, a clear song flowed from her soft lips.
"Clouds floating in the sky, carrying rain, where do you go?"
Sunae joined in with a thin voice. Hyung-sik heard the song too. His spirit soared with the music, as if wings had sprouted, flying freely among the clouds. An indescribable feeling—cool and warm at once—filled his heart with joy.
Elder Kim turned to the Pastor. "Come, let's go to my study and talk."
The three rose.
🙝 🙟
Elder Kim's study was Western-style. Ever since he had served as minister to the United States, he tried to live as much as possible in the Western manner.
The floor was covered with a rug patterned with red peonies. Painted pictures in frames hung on all four walls. Most were religious paintings. On the north wall, the largest frame held an image of Jesus praying in Gethsemane. A few feet to the east, a slightly smaller frame showed the infant Jesus in a manger. On the west wall hung his own half-length portrait. A Western gentleman might have hung a few masterpieces beyond religious art, but Elder Kim had no taste for fine art and did not understand its value. He believed that only religious paintings had worth. Other paintings—ancient landscapes, plum blossoms, bamboo—he regarded somewhat highly, but thought them unsuitable for a Western-style room. As for Western figure paintings, especially beauties or nudes, he had never seen them and had no desire to; even if he saw them, he would not recognize their value. He barely knew the word "art" and wondered what use paintings were anyway. Sculpture, in particular, he had probably never considered in his fifty years of life. Thus, what Westerners treasured—art, alongside religion—was worth next to nothing in his eyes. If a Westerner were to judge him, they would wonder, "How can someone be a civilized person without knowing art?" Truly, no civilized person is ignorant of art.
Elder Kim not only decorated his room in Western style but also often wore Western clothes and slept in a Western-style bed. He respected the West, especially America. So he tried to imitate them in everything. And he had indeed imitated them for over twenty years. His belief in Jesus might have begun as an imitation of the West. He thought he understood the West well and imitated it well. Since he had served as a diplomat in Washington, he believed no one knew the West better than he. Therefore, he saw no need to learn more about the West. He considered himself the most progressive civilized person in Joseon. The church and society agreed. But there was one group that did not: the Western missionaries.
The missionaries knew that Elder Kim did not understand the content of Western civilization. They knew he did not understand science, philosophy, art, economics, or industry. Though he claimed to know religion, he only knew the Korean style of Christian faith. He had never even thought about the essence of Christianity, the relationship between Christianity and humanity, or between Jesus and the Korean people.
Civilization encompasses science, philosophy, religion, art, politics, economics, industry, and social systems. To understand Western civilization means to understand these contents. On what basis did Elder Kim claim to know the West? The Western missionaries knew this. So they called him a man who imitated the West. This was not an insult but a statement of his true state. If a man does not know the content of Western civilization but wears Western clothes, builds Western-style houses, and follows Western customs, what else can it be called but imitation? He could be forgiven because he was not frivolous, not without conviction, and not merely imitating out of vanity. He genuinely believed—not realized—that the West was superior and that we must inevitably follow them. His ignorance is not something we can blame. He is indeed ignorant. He would be angry to hear it, but he is ignorant. He thinks that by glancing at things, he can understand Western civilization. Truly, he has no better method. But can one understand Western civilization by just glancing? Even after ten or twenty years of reading books, listening to teachers, and thinking for oneself, only someone with special talent, diligence, and keen sight can hope to understand a foreign civilization. No matter how bright Elder Kim's natural intellect, how could he grasp the true meaning of a complex new civilization without reading a single book?
Still, Elder Kim sent his children to school. He didn't know what they studied there, but because Westerners sent their children to school, he believed that was the right thing to do. "Believed" is more accurate than "knew." So his children would eventually come to understand civilization. In this way, Joseon too would gradually fully digest the new civilization.
There was only one danger. People like Elder Kim, overconfident in their knowledge, interfered with their children's thoughts—thoughts formed by learning the new civilization at school. The children knew well, but when they thought things their father had never considered, he regarded their ideas as heresy and tried to eradicate them. This is how the tragedy of the so-called clash between old and new ideas occurs, a common tragedy when new civilization enters. Thoughts never considered by the old appear heretical to them, but in reality, they are new truths unknown to the old. A son should always surpass his father; otherwise, progress would be impossible. But the old dislike the new knowing more than they know. The responsibility for the tragedy of the clash between old and new often lies with the old.
🙝 🙟
Elder Kim had not hung those paintings for the sake of art, but seeing them indirectly cultivated a love of art in his children. He cared not for the paintings themselves but for the image of Jesus depicted in them. His children, in contrast, found the paintings themselves more interesting than the Jesus portrayed. How could they be painted so exquisitely? That a joyful face showed joy, a sorrowful face showed sorrow, that grass looked exactly like grass, flowers exactly like flowers—this fascinated his children. It was a pleasure Elder Kim did not understand, one that only his children knew.
Elder Kim looked around his study, proud and satisfied with its modernity and elegance. He offered chairs to the Pastor and Hyung-sik. A round table was placed in the center, and the three sat around it like the legs of a cauldron. Hyung-sik wanted a cigarette but held back. He looked around the room again. The cool evening breeze softly stirred the white lace curtain, and each time, the tender leaves of a laurel plant on the windowsill trembled. Thinking of the conversation to come, Hyung-sik's heart beat faster. But he felt ready to answer without hesitation, no matter what was said. He would follow Useon's advice. The harmonium and singing could still be heard. He was happy. He wished they would start talking soon, and looked at the Pastor and Elder Kim's lips.
The Pastor said, "I spoke with Hyung-sik earlier. It seems he has roughly agreed. Now, you can speak directly." He looked at Hyung-sik.
Elder Kim said, "Yes, thank you. My daughter is not worthy, but if you do not reject her..."
"Haha," the Pastor laughed. "Elder, you are too modest. But truly, you two are well matched." He seemed pleased.
Elder Kim continued, "If you have no intention, I would not force you. But I say this because I care for you, Hyung-sik."
Hyung-sik, determined not to act foolishly as before, quickly replied, "How dare I say anything? But am I worthy?" His face reddened.
Elder Kim, seeming satisfied, leaned back in his chair. "That is too modest. So, you accept!" He fixed his gaze on Hyung-sik. Hyung-sik lowered his head briefly, then remembering Useon's "fool" remark, abruptly lifted his head, straightened his chest, and composed his expression. But still, the word "yes" wouldn't come out, and he struggled inwardly.
The Pastor urged, "Come, give your answer." Elder Kim added, "Indeed. Is there any reason to hesitate?"
Hyung-sik gathered all his strength. "Yes." Then he turned his head, feeling both amused and embarrassed.
"You accept?" Elder Kim leaned forward as if to confirm. Hyung-sik, imitating Useon's liveliness, said, "Yes, I will do as you command." He exhaled as if he had completed a difficult task. Indeed, he felt lighter, as if a heavy burden had been lifted. A new joy filled his heart, and Elder Kim's dignified face seemed suddenly warmer and friendlier. Hyung-sik felt as if in a dream.
"Oh, this is truly joyful!" The Pastor shook his body as if relieved.
"I cannot express how happy I am. Then let me call my wife so that we may finalize the matter." Elder Kim looked to the Pastor for approval.
"Yes. And nowadays, we must also hear the consent of the parties involved, so call Seon-hyeong too." The Pastor, in his own way, was discarding old customs and following new ideas.
Elder Kim rang the bell on the table twice. A maidservant appeared.
"Go tell the madam to come with the young lady..."
The maidservant seemed to know what was happening; she glanced at Hyung-sik, smiled slyly, and went out. The three sat in silence, but the smiles in their eyes spoke of their joy. Hyung-sik thought of meeting Seon-hyeong now. He recalled his thoughts when he first met her and when he taught her English. His head felt drunk. A painful joy filled his entire body.
The wife entered with Seon-hyeong behind her. Hyung-sik rose from his chair and greeted the wife. She smiled and returned the greeting. Seon-hyeong, standing partially hidden behind her mother, bowed to the Pastor, then to Hyung-sik. Her face was red, and so was Hyung-sik's. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with his handkerchief. The wife sat beside Elder Kim, and Seon-hyeong sat between her mother and the Pastor. Hyung-sik sat directly facing the wife.